Friday Night

I sit here, on a Friday night as twenty-one-year-old college student at one of Playboy’s top rated party schools, showered, in bed, and contemplating my future.
I am messaging with a best friend, who I have known since I was a fourteen-year-old high school freshman.
I am getting ready to make a cup of tea and do school reading before I hopefully fall asleep, before midnight. (I struggle with insomnia and have since high school)
I asked my boyfriend before he left if it’s embarrassing that it’s Friday night and I’m going to be doing homework, eating a Spoonbender he so kindly bought for me at Goodtimes, watching some ItsJudysLife vlogs and going to bed early. He said that it depends on who I’m asking, but not for him because [all of that] “sounds like my baby.”
Both of us are homebodies. And both of us have aspirations of our own that hopefully will define us as a “power couple.” Cheesy? Yes. Ambitious? Yes. Realistic? Yes.

I guess I could get to the point of this post.

I feel like those that are successful are the ones who do what they have to do (like going the extra mile), even if they don’t want to. And those that are successful are the ones who learn from their mistakes and learn to master the balancing act, of being young, reckless, having fun and being responsible and putting in the work when others are getting blackout drunk.

Do I go out? Absolutely. And do I enjoy myself when I do? You fucking bet I do.

I went out last Friday. But, I laid in the bed I made and went to my early morning CPR class feeling like absolute poop.

I guess the point is that you can’t be afraid to do what you think is right—or what you want to be doing. It’s cold and snowy and I have three midterms coming up so my priorities are somewhere other than going out to the bars or a house party and getting drunk.

I just think back to the quote about being unapologetically yourself. You can’t compromise who you are for acceptance into the “mainstream” norm. It’s taken me a long time to realize that and actually solidify it into a true and firm belief of mine.

I’m sorry for the rambling. I just felt like writing, so I did.

yours truly,
Amyrae